Be happy that she is your girl.

Guys, let’s be honest here. You like having her around. She makes you happy, makes you laugh, smile, and gives meaning to your life. So why not tell everybody about her? When you walk up to people that you know, always willingly introduce her as your girlfriend. This shows confidence and really solidifies her feelings toward you. Tell your buddies about how great she is. Don’t let them get into your head saying that you are “whipped” either. I absolutely hate this term with a passion. If you are doing the things that make her the happiest, that is all that matters. Who cares what they call it, you are being a gentleman to your girl. Don’t cave in to what others think. Show your gal the time of her life and always make sure she is happy. That is the most important thing out of anything: her happiness.

Also, willingly tell people how long you have been together. Say it like it is impressive, you know why, because it is. Every second you are with her is one more second you don’t have to live without her. She is an important part of your life and not only should you make her know it but everyone should know it. Understand this though, if she doesn't like you showing her off per say, you have to respect that. Girls don’t want to feel like another trophy you won. Instead, you need to portray them as the love of your life. Show that if she didn't exist, your life would be meaningless.

This dedication and commitment to spreading your feelings about her, will show her that you care. Especially if you do this in front of your friends. She will absolutely love that. When making her feeling as though she is needed, she will most likely feel complete happiness toward you and your relationship will be on the right track. Do not fail to do this. She is your lady and she deserves it. Nothing will come close to happiness like telling everyone of how lucky you are that she is your gal. She truly deserves every last minute of it. Never give up trying to tell people. They want to hear it again. Really, they actually don’t but it never hurts to spread word of the person that you love the most. Until next time, I leave you with this quote - “Having something special in your life is great; show it off.”

Being able to forgive.

Good news guys! Not only are you human, but I’m pretty sure women are too (I think). Because she is human, she is not perfect and is going to make a mistake at some point or another. You have to be able to know how to handle situations like this. Forgiveness is a very big step in this process. You must be able to judge the severity of what she has done for yourself. Keep in mind that people deserve a second chance. We as humans rarely get it right on the first try and feel regret immediately after you do it. You must be able to judge what is fair.

The best part of a relationship is that you both have feelings for each other. These feelings don’t just go away. Take into account that she is the person that you like to be with and that you would do anything to support her. Everyone messes up at some point. Forgiveness is important. If you do not forgive her, things will not be the same. It starts to build up internal anger until one day you can’t take it anymore. Forgiveness is emotionally cleansing and gives you a fresh slate. No relationship should end over a little mistake.

Forgiveness causes strength in a relationship believe it or not. It represents the two of you overcoming an obstacle. Overcoming obstacles help strengthen any relationship and keeps things moving properly. There is always going to be problems in a relationship. It is your choice whether you choose to forgive or not though. Do you choose to take the righteous path of forgiveness, or do you choose to move on? Though you may choose to move on, your feelings for her will always be embedded within you.

When it comes to forgiveness, you must listen to her full story. Keep an open-mind. Find out why she did what she did. Chances are there was a reason. If there wasn't a reason, then chances are it was by accident. Don’t be too quick to judge. She has been their for you, so you have to be their for her. Also, you have to know when she is being truly sincere. If she apologizes without sincerity, that should but a weight in your decision. If a girl is not being sincere to you, then chances are she is not the one for you. Until next time, I leave you with this quote - “It takes a strong person to say ‘I’m sorry’ , but an even stronger person to say ‘I forgive you’ ”.

The Little Things Count!

Have you ever noticed the smalls things about your girl? Do you know the things that no one else knows about her? If you don’t you might want to look at getting to know some of these things. For example, if I asked, what color are her eyes? Would you be able to answer this knowing one hundred percent that it is the right answer. Do you know when her birthday is? When you first met her? The first song you danced too with her? These are all the little things that you need to know about her. They may seem insignificant at first but trust me, they are not. These are some of the most important things in a relationship for you to know. If you do not know this stuff, you might be in trouble. Through these questions, you find out basic information about her that will benefit your relationship in the long run and ultimately make it stronger.

If you cannot remember information clearly, do not be afraid to start notes of things you don’t want to forget. You can write down almost anything you want to remember. Let’s say you do not remember dates well. You can write down her birthday and the day you two met that way you will never forget it. Showing her that you care enough to remember the things that are more difficult to remember, she will praise you for it. 

There are other little things that you should be doing for your girl. You should always be holding doors open for her. Always pay the check, you’re the man, sorry. Always help take off her jacket before she sits down. If she is cold, give her your jacket. Fun fact, in older times, men walked on the side of the sidewalk closest to the road so water and mud would not splash up onto the woman’s dress; instead, it hits you. These things require you to be very unselfish. You must commit yourself to doing things for her, not because you have to but because you want to. Acting gentlemanly is not really meant to be optional in a relationship. It is meant to be anticipated. You should want to do these things for her. It shows that you care for here, and it shows her that she makes you the best man you can be. Thus, creating a strong bond in the relationship and ultimately creating happiness. Until next time, I leave you with this quote - “Big surprises and large gifts are good, but the little things are what truly counts.”

R-E-S-P-E-C-T find out what it means to her.

Although many would say respect ties in with loyalty (because it does), there is another context that I am referring to. When I mean respect, I mean that you value her opinions. Respect shows that you care about what she cares about and values what she thinks. When she asks that you do something in a particular way or that you avoid doing something, you respect what she is asking. Don’t go against her word and especially do not go against yours if you promise something. There are many ways to show that you respect her and those are key to being a good gentlemen. When a girl gives her opinion about something, you don’t be judgmental of it and tell her she is wrong. It is called an opinion for a reason. Also, when she asks you not to do something, don’t do it. I know chances are that you are just wanting to joke around with her, but you have to respect her when she says stop. It is hard to get along with someone that doesn't understand the word stop. You need to stick up for her as well. If she gets into a situation with another person, you can’t abandon her. You must back her up and show her full support. If you abandon her in a situation, how can she trust you? How does she know that you won’t do it again, maybe if it’s something important? The more negative thoughts that you let her have, the greater the chance you will not last long with her. Always show her that you care for her opinions. Keep in mind that her values matter. You should want her to feel respected and safe to talk to you. Without this, she will never want to bring up subjects or express how she feels about things. If you are constantly making negative comments about her opinions and telling her that she is wrong, she will refuse to share them with you. Having an opinion is important; without an opinion, we don’t have much. That is why it is absolutely necessary to respect what she thinks and the choices that she makes. She expects you to always have her back and to always support her one hundred percent. Otherwise, why should she waste her time with someone that doesn't care about what she thinks? Until next time, I leave you with this quote - “Respect one another as you would want somebody to respect you.”

Compassion and love wins the race.

It is one thing to care about your girl, but it is another thing to show it. She wants to feel loved at all times. In order for you to do that, you not only have to feel it, but you have to say it and show it. Telling a girl how you feel does more to a woman than we think it does. It really solidifies her greatest feelings for you and truly erases the doubts in her mind. It lets her know “Hey, now I know for sure that he cares.” Although it seems like a little thing, it represents far more than you ever that it would.

Along with telling her, you must also show her how you feel. Don’t think of this as buying her the most expensive items per say. Think of it as giving and doing things for her that represent your feelings and surround your relationship with her. For instance, instead of buying her really expensive clothes or jewelry (this stuff is nice but doesn't represent your relationship well) you could get her something personal to her; this could be something she always wanted as a kid or could never find. Things such as these create precious moments in a relationship that lasts way longer than any clothing or jewelry would. Showing your love in unique ways is important; however, it does not have to be complicated. Although it may seem like you have to always buy her the best and greatest stuff (do it occasionally), you can simply show your love through precious and memorable gifts.

Not only should gifts be important, but you should also do romantic things for her. Depending on what she likes, you could do multiple things. For example, you could go on a walk with her one evening through the park or through the woods. You could go have a picnic on a hill that is over watching the sunset. Take her to the movies with a romantic dinner beforehand. Just don’t let things get boring. Always show her how much you love her through different ways.

You must give and show your feelings to the girl that you are with. Saying how you feel is only the start. Through this, you will find her being more happy and less likely to succumb to boredom. Love and compassion truly does win the race. Until next time, I leave you with this quote - “The love you give is the love that you get, but in the end, love is about giving, not receiving.”

Loyalty only to Her.

As a guy, you are going to be tempted by many things. Loyalty to a girl is important though. Don’t find yourself “looking” at other girls. Don’t feel like you need to keep your options open, you have a girlfriend and she is all you need. These things make her feel inferior to other girls and causes her to feel desperate to change. It makes her feel as though she is not good enough. She will always feel like she is in a competition; make her feel as though she is the only one you will ever need. Always put her first and never make her feel left out. You have to keep her “in the loop.” She trusts you, so do not take that for granted.

To make her feel as though you are being loyal to her, there are many things that you can do. Take her out often. Make her feel as though she is always getting the special treatment. By doing this, you make her feel important and that she is the only one for you. Always remind her of how beautiful she is. Through this, she will not feel self-conscious about herself and feel like she needs to change. Remind her of the reasons that you fell for her. All these things and many others will let her know that she is the one and that you will not leave her.

This creates trust in a relationship. Though you have this trust, this does not mean you have the right to be with other women behind her back. Relationships are not meant to be about sabotage and covert operations; it’s about commitment and compassion. Being truthful and loyal to the person that you love the most. To them, that is all that matters. The second you be with another woman or find another woman more attractive, to her the relationship might as well be over. Loyalty is important. It determines how a relationship starts and possibly ends. I don’t know about you, but I do not find this a good way for a relationship to end. Loyalty should not be taken lightly, it is the center of all relationships. It is our foundation and what truly makes a good relationship, good. Without loyalty, there is no trust. Without trust, there is no relationship. Until next time, I leave you with this quote - “Commitment is great, but loyalty shows true love.”

Be Open-Minded.

You, as a guy, will be responsible for making some “interesting” decisions in your relationship. You will be asked to try new things and do things that particularly interests her. Understand this: I am not saying that you have to do one hundred percent of the things that she wants to do. That is not what a relationship is about; however, you have to be willing to try new things. For example, if she asks you to go to the opera, go with her. At least try to do it once. Just remember, there are plenty of desperate single guys willing to take your place. Also, think of it this way: chances are, there are things that you enjoy doing and want to share with her. If you are open-minded with her, she will most likely be open-minded with you.

There are some things to remember. Do not just do it because it is the right thing to do. You have to attempt to participate and do all that you can with everything you have. Do not be too judgmental either. At the end of the day, if she asks you what you thought and you didn’t enjoy it, just respond with something like “It didn't particularly interest me but I’m always open-minded to what you wanna do.” Don’t make this sound like you are lying. Be truthful about it. Actually be open-minded to her suggestions. You may actually enjoy it and find out that you have been missing out this whole time.

Remember the exceptions that I was talking about in previous posts? There are many here. For example, do not find yourself robbing a bank or committing any other crimes because she wants to. Police don’t buy the excuse “I was just being open-minded for my girlfriend.” Also, if you find yourself in an extremely uncomfortable situation and can’t handle it, politely tell your girlfriend that you can’t handle it. She will most likely respect that you at least tried and honor your decision; however, don’t use this as an excuse to get out of something (see honesty blog post). Only use it if you truly can’t handle what you are doing. Lastly, if you find yourself in an extremely dangerous situation, tell her. If you know that she is in a dangerous situation and do nothing about it and something happens, that is on you. Take responsibility here and tell her that you don’t want to see her get hurt. She may be upset at first, but that definitely beats something bad happening to her.

Be open-minded to your girlfriend. Understand that doing new things is not a terrible thing. It will strengthen your relationship and keep things interesting. Variety is the spice of life. Until next time, I leave you with this quote - “With an open-mind, you find endless possibilities to happiness.”

Honesty is the Best Policy.

It seems like honesty in this day in age is hard to find. People find that they must come up with an excuse or simply just put the blame on somebody else. I am here to tell you that if you do this and get found out, you are most likely in major trouble (depending on the severity of the situation). Nothing can beat the truth. Lying causes mistrust in a relationship. Soon you will become the little boy who cried wolf and she will never know when you are telling the truth. Even the little things, you still need to be honest; however, here is where the exceptions come into play guys. If you are asked a question that are in the same means of “Does this make my butt look big?”, really contemplate what your answer is going to be before you actually do. No woman wants to hear you say yes here.

Why honesty is important? Like I said before, it builds trust in a relationship. Let’s look at a scenario to better explain. Say your lady has caught you on numerous occasions lying to here. In fact, it is to the point where she doesn't believe a word that comes out of your mouth. One day you are talking to your attractive and single neighbor. She admits to you that she has a huge crush on you and it’s too bad that you are in a relationship. You then explain to her that you truly care for your significant other and couldn't imagine your life without her. As jealousy strikes while seeing your significant other pull in the driveway, she kisses you. As you try to pull away, it is too late because your girlfriend has already seen it. You quickly try to your girlfriend about the crush that your neighbor had on you, but nothing is working. Your neighbor is denying the whole thing in hope to break you up and your girlfriend doesn't believe you because of the countless times you lied to her before. Thus, the relationship is over.

As you can see, if the relationship was built on honesty rather than lies, she would have most likely believed you. So honesty is important, whether it be big or small. Telling the truth is far better than lying and getting found out. But remember, if you get a dreaded question like the one mentioned at the end of the first paragraph, use your instinct. Until next time, I leave you with this quote - “The cold hard truth hurts less than a stone cold lie.”

Communication is key!

Communication seems like a cliched term but the truth is that it actually works. Without communication, any sort of relationship is boring; this results in the two people drifting apart and ultimately an end to the relationship. So guys, what can you do? Well, the answer can be summed up in one word: listen. Notice how I didn't say hear what she is saying; you must actually interpret and understand what she is saying. I understand that for guys this can be difficult, but it is absolutely necessary. You may be wondering, how do I stay interested or what can I do to make her feel like I am actually listening? A good technique to use is active listening. This is commonly used by psychologists and psychiatrists on their patients to help them understand information and let their patients know that they are actually listening. Active listening will require you to consciously remain in the conversation and will help keep you on track. How it works? When you are listening, pay attention to the details of what they are saying. Always make eye contact, use facial expressions (within reason), nod, and occasionally repeat key points or encourage her to keep going.

You must never interrupt her, respond with judgment, get distracted, zone out, or change the topic. By doing this, you make her feel as though you don’t care and don’t want to talk to her. Even if you are not particularly interested in the topic, she cares about it and wants to share it with you. By listening, you strengthen your relationship, create trust, and it allows her to actually see that you care and enjoy talking to her. If for some reason you did not know this, this is good for you. First, it really gives you an idea of who she is and if you think the relationship would work. Second, chances are you will find out some truly amazing things about her and will ultimately strengthen your relationship. And as an added note, just because you are a guy, doesn't mean you have to be a rock. You are allowed to show emotion and express your feelings. Truth is, she will likely feel happy that you shared your feelings with her. Don’t remain isolated; let her know how you feel regularly and don’t be afraid to show her that you have feelings.

So the idea is simple: listen and communicate. Without this, no relationship can last. And remember that just because you are a guy, doesn't mean you can’t share your feelings with her. This cannot be just one-sided though; both must listen, and both must share. Until next time, I leave you with this quote - “Communication in a relationship, is like the sun to the earth; without the former, the latter cannot exist.”

Welcome to a Gentlemen’s Blog!

Welcome everyone! This is a blog for those of you looking for advice, information, or just quality material to read if you are bored. I've created this blog to give advice on how guys should be treating women. Make no mistake, this is not meant strictly for guys; I am intending this for both men and women. So please don’t be turned away and read with an open mind.

For the Men (In a Relationship/Not in a Relationship): This blog can possibly save your life, metaphorically speaking. There are many ways that this blog could come in handy for you. For instance, if you feel like you are being avoided or completely ignored, there is a good chance you’ve offended her whether it be indirectly or directly. Que the blog. You can learn how to fix rough situations and right the wrong that was done. Remember that you are a guy, you will most likely make a mistake along the way whether it be purposeful or not. Just remind her of how much you love/like her and that you never meant to hurt her. On the other hand, if nothing is actually wrong with your relationship or you are not in one, you can use this as a guide to help make your relationship great in the future.

(As an added side note, NEVER HIT A WOMAN. You are a low-life creature if you do; no matter the situation, abuse is never the option whether it be from the man or woman).

For the Women (In a Relationship/Not in a Relationship):  You can use this as a reference. For those of you ladies that are in a relationship, use it to see if your fella is doing these things to help strengthen your relationship. For those of you not in a relationship, whether you are looking for one now or for the future, this gives you sort of a checklist to help you find the right guy. Remember though ladies, we are guys, and we rarely get it right on the first try; however, it’s those guys that are willing to put in the effort that truly deserve a second chance.

(As an added note for you ladies, abuse from a man should NEVER be tolerated; if you are being abused in a relationship, TELL SOMEONE. There is absolutely no reason for a man to hit a woman (or vise-versa) and it should be greatly considered before even thinking about giving them a second chance).

To All: Remember that with every idea there are some exceptions. You have to know what these exceptions are, however, I will do my best to explain them. If you have any questions, please feel free to comment; if you need help with something personal, you can email me at warnerobbie@yahoo.com and I will try to get back with you as soon as possible. If I have not answered you back, please kindly leave a comment saying you emailed me and I promise to get back to you. Until next time, I leave you with this quote - “We may fight, we may argue, and we may disagree; however, as long as the stars shine bright, my love for you will never end, and I will strive to be the person that you need me to be.”